silence

Things to do:
1. Stand still while waiting for penguin-shaped digital camera to begin recording
2. Abruptly bust out in dance, beginning with right fist thrown above head
3. Turn towards television, absorb a second or two of tonight's Seinfeld rerun
4. Face camera again while continuing legendary shuffle
5. Pump both fists, attempt to clap, miss, lose balance
6. Boo-fart on the television
7. Bring left leg up, waddle waist a tad, accidentally reveal northern tip
8. Conceal northern tip
9. Mash potato the fuck out of myself
10. Shake right pointer finger as if to say "I aint afraid of no ghost"
11. Motion towards the sky as if to say "but I am afraid of thunder!"
12. Bend down, demonstrate how I'd look if I were starting two lawn mowers while simultaneously swatting away a summertime bumble bee
13. Engage in some other floppy shit
14. Realize it's incredibly creepster to do all of the above without making a single sound, turn camera off
15. Remember 9-11